Walk Softly and Carry a Big Stick

Walk softly and carry a big Stick. Make sure it is the biggest and shiniest Stick you can find, so that everyone who sees it will want one. Take your Stick to functions and introduce it to influential people: friends and enemies. Give your Stick a black Mercedes Benz. Make sure it is the biggest, shiniest black Mercedes Benz that you can find, so that everyone will want one. Keep your Stick close; never let it out of your sight. Make your Stick strong: feed it daily a diet of fear, supplemented with doses of paranoia. There is a conspiracy. There is a plot to overthrow the revolution. The counter-revolutionary forces will stop at nothing. We must protect the revolution. The revolution is good. The goodness of the revolution is for the people. Whoever is against the revolution is against the people, and the people are the masses, and the masses must be mobilized to defend the revolution. Tell your Stick how much he reminds you of yourself at his age.

Your Stick has grown older now. Take him to the meeting house of the elders. Make him sit next to Whip. Whip will show him the Ropes. In the meeting house of the elders take Stick aside and point to him all those who would strangle the revolution in its cradle. When your Stick feels a rush of blood to his knob and says something stupid, do not defend him. Sit on the fence. Let him dance on thorns for a while, because this will make him harder.

The time has come to save the revolution. Tell Stick to go the masses. Give him enough money to buy beer for everyone. Tell Stick to tell those who drink his beer to save the revolution. If they agree, they will now be Little Sticks: hundreds and hundreds of little sticks drinking Stick’s beer that you gave him. Tell Stick to tell the Little Sticks to take some of their new beer money and buy cellphones. Give one cellphone to each group of boys playing soccer in the street. If they take the cellphones they are now your Doggs: thousands and thousands of Doggs talking on the cellphones you gave them. Teach the Doggs to come when you call them. Teach them to bring Sticks when you tell them. Use your voice to do this. If you like you can sing a song telling the Doggs to bring the Little Sticks, that way whenever you sing the song you will know how many Doggs are listening to you by the number of Little Sticks that end up at your feet.

The time has come to save the revolution. Tell Stick to tell the Little Sticks to tell the Doggs to find the smell of counter-revolutionaries. Tell Stick to throw all the Little Sticks in a pile together under the enemies of the people. Tell Stick to set fire to the Little Sticks. Tell Stick to tell the Doggs to bark. Burn, Little Sticks, burn. Bark, Doggs, Bark. Run, Stick, Run.

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